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  I hit LaTangie head-on, and we both went toppling to the floor. I punched her with a left, a right, and a left again before grabbing hold of her hair (which I’d known all the while was a weave—you can’t play a player) and yanking with all my might until I’d virtually snatched her bald.

  Then I jumped up and pulled the phone line from the wall. I knew she wasn’t going to make a run for it—she was too busy blubbering and gathering her tracks, which were scattered all over the carpet.

  “I hope your johns downtown like your new look!” I spat.

  The look on LaTangie’s face told me that it was her I saw in that seedy hotel.

  I gave her one last pitiful look and walked out of the office. I was going to leave the building, but at the last minute I changed my mind. It wouldn’t be right of me to leave without saying goodbye to Anja, now would it?

  Crystal

  i couldn’t believe my ears. “I—I don’t understand, Noah.”

  Noah took a deep breath and started with “Remember that summer when I was sick?”

  “Sick?”

  “Sick, girl, sick—out of my fucking mind…the summer I spent sleeping with…yuck, women!”

  “Oh, yeah, I remember,” I said, and then it dawned on me. “I thought you were being safe, using condoms, I—”

  “You know me better than that. Of course I was being safe. But things happen, you know.”

  Boy, did I!

  “The condom broke, but I didn’t know it, and so Merriwether got pregnant and—”

  “Merriwether? A white girl?”

  “No, she’s a sister…Can you please stop interrupting me?”

  “Sorry.”

  “So Merriwether turns up pregnant and she don’t know where to find me, ’cause it was just a one-night stand—you know how I was doing…”

  Yeah, I knew.

  “But here’s the kicker: she was engaged to an old lover of mine named Will Somers when she slept with me.”

  “Will Somers? One of your old lovers? Noah, I—I don’t understand.”

  This story was getting weirder by the minute.

  “Yes, Crystal—damn, don’t act like you don’t know about brothers playing on both teams.

  “Any-hoo, I bumped into both of them in London…No one was more surprised than I was when I found out that he was marrying a female.”

  My head was spinning.

  “But the marriage didn’t even last. Will decided that he preferred dick and had the marriage annulled.”

  “Are you serious?”

  “Dead serious. Then Destiny was born.”

  “Destiny?”

  “Destiny, that’s her name, my daughter,” Noah said, his voice swelling with pride.

  I was trying hard to follow the story.

  “I saw Will in the subway station when I was coming to Geneva’s Christmas in May celebration, and he told me that Merriwether was looking for me and passed her number on to me.” Noah exhaled long and hard and then said, “Which is how we come around to now.”

  I just blinked. This story was as unbelievable as they come.

  “Damn, Noah.”

  “That’s what I said, but there’s more.”

  That was enough, I thought, but said, “Go on.”

  “Merriwether wants me to raise the child. She wants me to have sole custody.”

  “What?”

  How could a woman give her child up? What kind of mother was she!

  “You, why?”

  Noah was quiet for a minute. I guess my tone had been hard and judging, because I believed a child needed a mother, especially a girl child.

  Noah was a man, a gay man at that, I thought, and only right then and there did it make sense. I’m sure Noah was probably more woman than Merriwether was.

  “Why not me?”

  “No, no, Noah,” I said, softening my tone. I had to clean this up, and fast. “I just wanted to know why it was a woman would want to give up her child?”

  “Well,” Noah began thoughtfully, “she loves her, of that I’m sure, but she’s been unemployed for more than a year and living with her mother in a studio apartment in Crown Heights. And well, Crystal, she’s sick.”

  “Sick?”

  “She was diagnosed with MS and it’s progressing rapidly. The doctors say that in six months she’ll be bound to a wheelchair.”

  “Oh, shit, Noah. I’m sorry to hear that.”

  “Yeah, I was too. It’s not like she’s abandoning Destiny—”

  “No, of course not, Noah—she’s turning her over to her father,” I said.

  “Yes, that’s exactly what she’s doing. Turning her over to her father, to me.”

  We were quiet for a while, listening to each other breathe. And then Noah piped up: “So, Miss Girl, you have a bun in the oven. What’s Neville saying about it?…It is Neville’s, right?”

  Geneva

  are you calm?” Deeka asked.

  “Yes.”

  “Sure, Ma?”

  “Yes,” I squeezed out a second time from between clenched teeth.

  I was flat on my back on the kitchen floor; Deeka had secured my right arm and Eric my left.

  Charlie’s screams had died down to tearful whimpering.

  “Okay now, if we let you up, are you going to behave?” My son spoke to me like I was his child. I felt the rage begin to bubble again.

  “Yes.”

  Deeka’s face was practically pressed against mine, and he stared intently into my eyes.

  “Nah, wait a minute, Eric. Her pupils are really dilated. Something is definitely not right here.”

  Eric leaned over and peered at my eyes. I felt like a guinea pig.

  “Get out of my face.”

  My voice was quivering; I could feel myself about to lose control again.

  “’Neva.” Deeka spoke softly, calmly. “Have you been taking anything?”

  I shook my head no.

  “Are you sure, nothing?”

  I shook my head no again.

  “What about your magic beans, Mommy?” Charlie’s small voice sailed over to us.

  I was busted!

  “What are you talking about, Charlie?” Eric asked, raised his head.

  “Mommy takes magic beans, like ‘Jack and the Beanstalk,’ but her magic beans will make her shrink.”

  Charlie was speaking real fast.

  Deeka and Eric gave me a quizzical look.

  “Right, Mommy?”

  Charlie was standing over me now, her Pooh Bear clutched in her arms, her eyes red and swollen from crying, perfect pug nose moist and red.

  I looked up at my darling daughter and then over to my son and boyfriend and whispered, “The child is confused…delusional…a liar, just like her father.”

  Deeka and Eric exchanged shocked looks.

  “Charlie, do you know where Mommy keeps her magic beans?”

  “In her pocketbook.”

  “Go get them for me, okay, munchkin?”

  Charlie nodded and scurried off.

  Deeka planted sad eyes on me. “’Neva…why?”

  What did he know?

  He had never been publicly humiliated by the “Jelly Belly” song.

  Crystal

  when I hung up with Noah my first instinct was to call Geneva, but my hand just couldn’t seem to bring itself to dial her number. She’d been acting so whacked out lately that I didn’t know how she would take the news, and I really didn’t need a negative reaction from her.

  She was my best friend, and it pained me not to be able to share this wonderful news with her.

  I called my mother instead.

  “Ma?”

  “Hey, Chrissy. How are you, darling?”

  I don’t know why, but the sound of my mother’s voice burst the dam I had been struggling to maintain, and all the sorrow, frustration, and happiness spilled out of me in one long wail.

  “Mommmmmmy!”

  “Oh, baby girl, what’s wrong?”

  I was a so
bbing mess, but Peyton Atkins held it together for both us. Her voice remained calm, her words soothing.

  After about ten minutes, I was able to collect myself enough to speak.

  “Mommy, I-I’m pregnant.”

  She was quiet for a long moment, no doubt trying to process the words I’d just spoken.

  “A baby?”

  “Yes, in January.”

  “My baby is having a baby?”

  “Yes, Mommy.”

  Peyton let off a long whistle and then her voice came back, filled with sunshine and excitement. “My baby is having a baby. I’m going to be a grandmother!”

  I imagined her doing some kind of happy dance in the middle of her bedroom or wherever she was in her house, and then she began to cry, which got me to crying again too.

  Chevy

  okay, okay now, just go slow, real slow…that’s it…that’s it…You got it now, baby. Oh, oh, watch the teeth—this ain’t no sausage, you know.

  “Yeah, yeah, that’s better, reaaal good. Take it all in now, take it all in…I know it’s a lot, but you can do it…They don’t call you Deep Throat for nothing, now do they?”

  Anja is grossly slipping up, I thought as I stood watching from the doorway. Wasn’t nothing wrong with a little office delight, but how could one forget to lock the friggin’ door?

  I’d been standing there for a minute, amazed at how freaky it was to see Andre’s female persona, all femmed up in an Etro silk blouse and skirt set, stockings dangling from one ankle, with legs up in the air, spread eagle, big hands clutching the inner part of her thighs while her elbows pressed deep into the cushy armrests of the chair, supporting the weight of her muscular legs.

  The chair was tilted recklessly back on its stem, and that along with Andre’s big, black cock seeming to torpedo out from beneath the colorful silk of the fabric made the whole scene look ludicrous at best.

  Myra from Accounting was on her knees; the pumps she wore were new—no scuff marks on the soles. I wish I could say the same about her ass, riddled with pimples and liver spots—I guess it’d seen better days.

  I watched in awe as Myra opened her perfect little mouth and swallowed all nine inches of Andre’s dick.

  I stifled a laugh and pulled my Razr camera phone from my back pocket. I would capture this scene for posterity, or at least for a few future laughs.

  When the cool air flowed through the open door and hit Anja’s wet dick, her eyes flew open.

  “What the fuck?” she screamed, and roughly pushed Myra away. “Close the goddamn door, Chevy!”

  And I did, slowly, of course; Anja’s angry screams had made their way out into the hallway, drawing the concerned and curious from their offices.

  “Have you lost your goddamn mind!” Anja barked, jumping from her chair and pushing her skirt down all in one action.

  Myra crawled frantically around the floor, gathering articles of clothing.

  “So, it seems that La Fleur Industries is nothing more than your personal whorehouse,” I said as I calmly rested my hand on the doorknob.

  Anja’s eyes bulged. “Just what are you thinking about doing, Chevy, huh?”

  I smiled smugly.

  “You do remember signing a confidentiality clause, don’t you?”

  I nodded my head yes.

  “You know if you break that clause I will prosecute. You know that, don’t you?”

  Anja wasn’t Anja anymore; Anja was Andre now, in full baritone voice.

  I grinned. We were one and the same, weren’t we?

  Both pretending to be someone we weren’t.

  Both using people for our own selfish purposes.

  “I know you will,” I sighed as I slowly turned the doorknob. “Pull your pantyhose up,” I said matter-of-factly.

  Anja’s face twisted with surprise, and then she hurriedly bent over and pulled her pantyhose up and into place.

  I looked over at Myra, who was struggling to button her blouse. When she raised her eyes to meet mine, they were crossed, their gaze fixed intently on her nose.

  I pulled the door open and the crowd that had gathered in the hallway peered in.

  “Good morning!” I greeted their curious faces with a bright smile before making my way around them and down the hall.

  My cell phone clutched tightly in my hand, I began to laugh and continued to do so all the way down in the elevator, through the lobby, and out the door.

  I laughed down Sixth Avenue and I’m sure my laughter could be heard through the grates of the subway station as I waited patiently for the F train.

  Geneva

  i sat quietly and obediently on the sofa. Charlie was snuggled up against me; Eric sat in a folding chair across from me, staring down at his hands.

  Deeka was on the phone with the poison control center, my bottle of Biothin clutched tightly in his hand.

  “Thank you very much,” he said, and then hung up the phone. He released a long sigh before walking over and standing in front of me.

  “The people at Biothin said that some people have an extreme mental or behavioral psychotic reaction to…” He stopped speaking and brought the bottle up to his face. He strained to read the small print before carefully enunciating the word: “ech-no-lysia.”

  “Echno-what?” Eric said, looking up at him.

  “It’s some type of extract found in a plant in South America,” Deeka said, sitting down heavily on the couch and looking at me. “They also said that that information is always included in their package orders.”

  I avoided his eyes.

  “Did you read the information, Geneva?”

  Of course I’d read some of it, but not all.

  I didn’t respond.

  “What did the people at the poison control center say?” Eric’s voice quaked a bit with his question.

  Deeka took a deep breath. “They basically said the same thing that the Biothin people said, and suggested that we take her to the hospital.”

  Noah

  i felt as nervous as a virgin about to get my first piece.

  “Zahn?”

  I didn’t know what time it was in New Delhi, and I didn’t care.

  “Noah, is that you?”

  At least he sounded happy to hear from me.

  “Something has happened.”

  “Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

  He was concerned. He still loved me. Thank God.

  “I’ve thought about the whole children thing, and I agree, we should have a child.”

  For a while the only noise between us was the pulsating waves of static.

  “Really?” Zahn finally replied.

  “Yes, and—and…”

  I didn’t know just how to say it.

  “And I have the perfect little girl.”

  “What?”

  “It’s a long story, Zahn, but I just found out I have a daughter.”

  Zahn laughed. “Is this some type of joke?”

  “No, no, it’s not a joke. I’m serious.”

  Again, silence.

  “Zahn?”

  “I’m a little confused, Noah. What do you mean, you have a daughter?”

  I looked at the clock. This was going to be a very expensive phone call.

  It would be cheaper to have Zahn fly to New York for a face-to-face.

  “How about this,” I started in an unsure voice. “How about you fly here and meet her for yourself?”

  Crystal

  i didn’t expect the reaction that I received from Neville.

  When I passed on the news he let out a scream that pierced my eardrums and then he said, “I knew it, I knew it!”

  “You knew? How?”

  “I just had this feeling, Crystal. The last night you were here and we made love, neither of us realized the condom had come off, and—”

  “The condom came off? I thought it must have broken.”

  “No, when you got up to go to the bathroom, it was lying on the sheet.”

  “Why didn’t you say
anything?”

  “I didn’t want to alarm you.”

  “So those phone calls, when you were asking if I was okay—you sounded so concerned…You knew then?”

  “I felt it somehow. It’s hard to explain. But then when you didn’t say anything, I thought I was wrong.”

  “This is so freaky.”

  “Yeah, it is.”

  “So you’re happy about this? You don’t mind if I have the baby?”

  “Mind? Why would I mind you bringing my child—our child—into the world?”

  “Your lifestyle…”

  “Do you think that would interfere with me being a good father?”

  “You’re a good person, Neville. I suspect that means you would be a good father and a loving one.”

  “Crystal.” Neville’s voice became serious. “I would want to spend as much time with you and the baby as possible. You know that, right?”

  Oh God—was he going to propose marriage?

  “Yes, I know that.”

  “So, um—if you want to…me and you…the baby…”

  My heart was bursting. I loved Neville: he was a good man, a good friend, and a wonderful lover. But I knew the one thing he wouldn’t be good at was being a husband.

  “Are you trying to ask me to marry you, Neville?”

  He let out a small laugh. “I guess I was.”

  “I don’t need that, Neville. I need a friend and a father for this child. That’s what I need.”

  Neville sighed. “That’s what you got, Crystal.”

  Chevy

  just as I stepped off the F train at Jay Street Borough Hall, the A train pulled into the station.

  The other passengers and I hurried onto the train and scrambled for seats.

  I was going to Brooklyn, going to Noah’s, going back home. I felt like I was climbing out of a bad dream that had been going on for most of my adult life. It felt good to finally wake up.